The Science of Sleep

Attempting to sleep while high:

This warm, fuzzy, all-over body high is really quite lovely. Did I remember to set my alarm?

Zzzzzz.

[No dreams]

Attempting to sleep while sober:

Sleeping is so fucking weird. I'm really just gonna lie here for the next eight hours doing nothing? That's way too close to being dead. Holy shit I REALLY don't want to die. How does anybody keep their shit together knowing they're going to cease to exist at some point? It's a goddamn miracle everyone hasn't gone fucking crazy just thinking about it.

What if they're right and we really can figure out a way to live indefinitely by uploading our brains into indestructible robo-bodies? How could billions of people have been allowed to die just because they happened to be born at the wrong time in history? How is that fair? There has to be some sort of afterlife. It's obviously not stereotypical heaven or whatever, but there's definitely something about the human soul that's eternal.

Am I still afraid to go to sleep? Is that what's going on here? What am I, six years old? How have I not gotten over this? I do it every night, don't I? How could I objectively love sleep yet still have this deep-seated fear of it. Fuck, I wish I had weed.

I never sleep, cause sleep is the cousin of death.

What a fucking shame that Nas never equaled the dizzying heights of Illmatic. That's got to suck, to put out your masterpiece when you're 20, then never come close to approaching that level of greatness again. I guess he did make a fucking masterpiece. Rich motherfucker.

Damn, that clock ticks loud. Fucking studio apartment.

Remember when you were a kid and you tried to give yourself good dreams by thinking about really awesome shit?

Two woman blow job. Two woman blow job. Two woman blow job. Two woman blow job...

Zzzzzz.

[Nightmare about crashing car, being unable to sell it/pay off credit card debt]